3/23/12

When I am Weak I am Strong

Pastor Rufan: Tara, can you teach at the meeting next week?
What’s running through Tara’s mind: That would be a great opportunity to be able to do the devotion at the beginning of the meeting. As long as I give it some thought before hand, I can totally share about a verse for five minutes in Malagasy.
Tara: Sure! Sounds good.
Pastor Rufan: You will have 20 minutes to talk about a few things you think are important for the Good News Club teachers to remember and things that are important for them to do as they are teaching.
What’s running through Tara’s mind: Did he just say 20 minutes?? He must have said 12 minutes…I get 12 and 20 mixed up on a regular basis anyway… Wait….I will actually be teaching them?? We aren’t talking about a devotional here??
Tara: *comes out in somewhat of a stutter* 20 minutes?? About things that are important for the teachers?? Next Wednesday??
Pastor Rufan: Yeah, that would be great. Thanks!
Tara: 20 minutes??
Pastor Rufan: Yeah, you will have 20 minutes.
Tara: Right, right, ok. Next Wednesday… 20 minutes…

Just that morning, I had started to working on a blog post that was titled, “When I am Weak I am Strong.” On a journey to start memorizing verses I know in English in Malagasy, I had chosen Phil 4:13 that day. “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.” As I sat in the meeting, my mind nowhere near the topics being discussed, I can’t say I have felt so….weak….in sufficient…incapable…in a really long time. The first thing I reminded God of was that while I can usually handle conversations pretty well, teaching for 20 minutes at an adult level is not conversation. I then reminded God that I am a serious perfectionist when I am teaching. I like to execute everything to perfection, I hate using notes, and I certainly don’t stumble over the words that I have carefully selected to say everything just how I want with the exact meaning in place. Then I recalled how I have been praying that God will give me opportunities to stretch myself when it comes to Malagasy, and wisdom in knowing how to continue to progress in the area of language. Maybe this was God’s answer. The rest of the meeting was spent with Phil. 4:13 running through my head and a quote I had seen on a friend’s facebook page. ““I asked God for strength, that I might achieve. I was made weak, that I might humbly learn to obey.” Suddenly my relatively calm world had been turned upside down. One of the things that I would usually say is one of my strengths, teaching, was a weakness like I had never experienced before. I carefully wrote out what I wanted to say in English. My amazing language helper, Haja, has been helping me put it into Malagasy. I feel like a first year college student nervously over-preparing for the first big project. Who know I would ever feel like that again?? As I prepare, I am reminded over and over that God’s power is made perfect in my weakness. Please pray for me as I prepare and pray that God will use the things I am preparing to talk about in the lives of the teachers.

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